


Visions of a Golden Coast

by horationelson



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, Post-Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Spoilers, lots of exposition because I'm That Guy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-02
Updated: 2016-01-02
Packaged: 2018-05-11 02:27:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5610475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/horationelson/pseuds/horationelson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Poe laughs and Finn is suddenly sure that he's been waiting to hear that noise for his entire life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Visions of a Golden Coast

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote a thing! The characterization is probably really weird in parts and this hasn't seen a beta, but fic is Not My Thing. I've just seen this movie 3 times now and want to claw off my own face. :D

After a month he's on the mend, and Finn spends as little time in the medbay as possible. It's too sterile there, and reminds him too much of the First Order barracks in which he was raised. It's different than that, though, because there are always people fussing over him, making sure he's okay: med-droids, nurses, Poe, even General Organa on some occasions. There have always been few times when Finn is alone, and now is no exception. But the personalized attention is new and different and he doesn't know how to feel comfortable there. He feels more human outside of that white-walled room--though it also feels an awful lot like running. Finn knows running. He's _wanted_ to run more often than he's _actually_ run, but that doesn't change the fact that Maz Kanata was right.

He never walks very far, though it's not for lack of desire. It's always the same passages, the same halls, day in and day out. Poe has told him about various scenic locales on D'Qar (they would sound an awful lot like date locations, if Finn knew what a date was), and one time R2D2 brought in a consolidated version of the Skywalker map to show exactly where Rey was going; it surprises Finn even still that they trust him like that. One of these days, hopefully soon, Finn wants to explore D'Qar and the entire galaxy. But for now he'll settle for the hallways near the medbay, where he can at least breathe.

Finn has only been gone for five minutes before there's a shooting pain in his spine. He feels the heat of the lightsaber and the pain of physical therapy all at once, a wincing jab that leaves him winded. The First Order wouldn't have settled for this; they were fodder, easy to train and easier to replace. But now there are people who care about him, people for whom Finn has to be strong. He has to keep fighting. Since he can't run off, literally or metaphorically, Finn settles for taking a seat in a nearby chair. Here he hopes to melt away into a pile of awkward embarrassment, praying to as many deities as he can remember so that no one will see him in this even more compromised state.

Of course, someone notices him almost immediately. That alone is bad, but the fact that Finn sees Poe Dameron standing above him makes it ten times worse. (By 'worse' he sort of means 'much better,' but he won't say that out loud.) Finn's been thinking about him a lot recently. It's easier to think about the cocky pilot than his absent best friend and being nearly cleaved in two by a lightsaber, after all. And there's one moment that always plays in Finn's mind when he's feeling low; it's playing now, too, and he can't really explain why. It certainly can't be because Poe just looks so... so _Poe_ , standing there in a half-buttoned flight suit and smelling of oil.

Poe crouches down in front of the chair and Finn looks up at him, slowly forgetting why he'd had to sit down at all. The other man looks-- well, not scared, but definitely concerned. About him. Finn feels heat on his face and waves Poe away, but it doesn't work. "Finn! I was headed to see you after a flight. You doing okay?"

Obviously not, but Finn will be damned before he says it. "Just wanted to see the sights," he says, immediately regretting how cheesy it sounds. There's no reason to lie to him, but Finn's so embarrassed and can't stop thinking about that day they were first reunited.

Luckily, the matter isn't pressed; maybe some of those deities are listening after all. "You didn't pick the most scenic place to stop," Poe says, eyes searching Finn's face. Finn is worried he's digging right into the depths of his mind and can see that moment playing over and over like a holotape; he figures if Poe were Force-sensitive, he'd be utterly doomed.

"Why did you do that thing with your lip?" Finn blurts out, eyes flicking to Poe's mouth and then quickly back up to his eyes. He has to know about that memorable moment, and asking is the only way to find out. Finn has learned that he's allowed to _ask_ things, that he doesn't have to go on just believing and following; of course, this isn't the most productive or questions, but it's a start. Poe is honest and friendly (and handsome, an intrusive part of Finn's mind chirps) and surely wouldn't mind answering a simple question. Somehow, after all of this, they're friends. That's the most amazing part of all.

A confused look breaks out across Poe's face, but happiness is very apparent in his dark eyes. He leans in a bit, rocking on his heels, and Finn doesn't care to know why. He's closer, which is all that matters. "Why did I-- what thing with my lip, buddy?"

"You know, the--" then Finn mimics it, slow teeth on skin, and for some reason Poe swallows. Hard.

Poe exhales a laugh and swipes a hand across his forehead, moving a curl of hair that Finn definitely hasn't been staring at their entire conversation. "Oh, _that_ thing. You remember that?"

This feels... strange. Not bad strange, but different than what Finn knows. All he knows is fear and running and _death_ but right now he's not thinking about those things. He's wondering why it's taken him so long to ask the nagging question, or wondering why he is asking at all. He's thinking about that little scar underneath Poe's right eye and how odd it must be for him to notice something like that. This strangeness feels warm, especially in the pit of his stomach. Finn wonders if Poe feels it too, or if this is just a feeling that non-socialized ex-stormtroopers feel. Is this what it feels like to _stay_?

"I was flirting with you, I guess." His voice sounds a lot less like 'I guess' and more like 'you idiot,' and it's painfully obvious. Finn is an idiot, probably.

Finn knows what flirting is. He was a stormtrooper, not dead. Conditioned and programmed or not, they were always given the appropriate anatomy lessons and told sternly to keep their hands to themselves. He knows how flirting works, at least fundamentally. Finn knows about hand-holding and winks, but not lip-biting shoulder grabs and oh, Force, why is it so hot in this hallway? He's always figured that there would never been anyone for him to flirt with, and _definitely_ no one would ever flirt with him. He was FN-2187, nothing more and nothing less. But now he's Finn, and the best damn pilot in the galaxy is admitting to flirting with him. How is it so simple? It feels impossible and perfect all at once.

Right now, Finn is contemplating crawling back to the medbay. It would probably be a lot easier than facing whatever this might be. But there's that strange warmness and Poe's just crouched here, looking at him like he's never done anything wrong in his entire life, and Finn can't keep his stomach from doing something like sixteen back flips. Carefully, Finn asks, "You were flirting with me because of a jacket? Your jacket?"

Poe laughs and Finn is suddenly sure that he's been waiting to hear that noise for his entire life. " _Your_ jacket," Poe reminds. It makes Finn ache. "I was flirting with you because you're handsome and you literally saved my life." A flash of sincerity shows on his face; it causes Finn's hand to shoot out without permission and wrap around Poe's fingers. The hand somehow ends up on Finn's knee and that warmness spreads down to his toes. "And did I mention handsome?"

"You mentioned handsome," Finn says, a sort of arrogant not unknown to the Big Deal of the Resistance. Rey would be, _will be_ , proud. 

Rolling his eyes exaggeratedly, Poe lifts up their clasped hands and drops them hard on Finn's leg. The movement is rough and feels like home. "Just making sure." Their eyes meet and Poe does the damn lip thing again, and even Finn is positive he's doing all this on purpose. "What d'you think about the flirting continuing?"

He's still in awe that Poe Dameron flirted with him, and is currently asking if he can _keep_ flirting with him. What sort of bantha-brained idiot would say no? "I guess," Finn says, resolute as ever. His voice sounds less like 'I guess' and more like 'yes, please.'

"You smug bastard." Finn wants to joke and call him a hypocrite, but Poe's toothy grin is too distracting. In the next second, their mouths are pressed together and neither one is really certain who initiated the contact. It doesn't matter in the end; Finn hopes there will be plenty of times in the future for them to pseudo-argue about it. He does know, though, that he's the one to squeeze Poe's fingers and lean in closer when the response is a pleased squeak.

For the first time in a long while, Finn doesn't feel like running. In fact, he's rather certain he could sit right here forever.

**Author's Note:**

> I whine and make a lot of unintelligible noises on [tumblr](http://horationelson.tumblr.com).


End file.
